Handling a Divorce

Divorce is on the rise in the UK, but if you’re thinking about taking this step it’s a good idea to talk over your feelings with a councillor first before starting the divorce proceedings. You can locate your local mediation team in England and Wales by calling the Family Mediation Helpline on: 0845 60 26 627, or online at: www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk.

If you live in Scotland Help information can be obtained from Family Mediation Scotland by calling: 0845 119 2020 or online at: www.familymediationscotland.org.uk.

And if you live in Northern Ireland more information can be obtained from Mediation Northern Ireland by calling: 028 90 438614 or online at: www.mediationnorthernireland.org.

Legal Advice and the Courts

If you do decide that divorce is your only option it is a good idea to get some legal advice so you know how you stand. You can only apply for a divorce if you have been married for one year in England, Wales and Scotland, and 2 years in Northern Ireland. Getting legal advice is particularly important if your family has substantial assets that will need to be divided between you and your spouse. You can locate a solicitor in your area by searching on the Law Society website:www.lawsociety.org.uk/choosingandusing/findasolicitor.law.

These days you can get a divorce quickly by simply completing the appropriate forms. This is a straightforward process if you and your spouse are in agreement about your divorce and there are no children or substantial assets to consider. You can get the forms you need from your local County Court. In most cases you won’t have to attend a court hearing unless you live in Northern Ireland where all divorce cases go before a judge.

The cost of your divorce will depend on how much expert help you require. Your solicitor will charge you by the hour so it’s a good idea to do as much of the work as you can yourself. You will also have to pay court costs if you are the person who wants the divorce (called the petitioner) unless you are exempt from these charges if the court rules you can’t afford to pay them. You may also be able to get legal aid. Check with your solicitor if you qualify.

Children and Divorce

One of the most important aspects of a divorce is deciding what will happen to your children. One of the recommendations in the Children Act 1989 was that as far as possible parents should try and decide which of them their children would live with after the divorce.

The divorce court would prefer not to get involved with the allocation of access rights to children, but they have powers (called court orders) to do so if the parties in the divorce can’t decide themselves. The court is concerned primarily with the welfare of the children and not the parents. It’s therefore in your best interest to try and come to an amicable arrangement with your spouse about your children.

Older children and young adults will most likely be asked by the court what their preferences are. There is a leaflet called ‘Keeping in Touch’ that gives information about how children are affected by divorce and how you as a parent can help them through this. The leaflet can be downloaded from the YoungMinds website.

Most divorce cases take up to 8 months to complete after the day you send your petition to the court. Remember your divorce isn’t complete and legally binding until you’ve been granted the final decree by the court dealing with your divorce.